Here's a digest of my very short stories, so you don't have to comb my feed or those hashtags to enjoy them. A few of these are from 2010, but they're still pretty decent.
I plan to do this on a more regular basis, so it won't be such a wall of text next time.
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- Time flies when you're having fun, they say. Which explained why he was still at the scene of the crime when the police arrived.
- Frost giants were known for their permafrost armor. The dragon wanted to see how long they took to melt.
- His return to the arena was met with much fanfare. His swift defeat was met with dumbfounded surprise.
- "You took a huge risk," the elf said. "we don't often reveal ourselves." The half-breed smiled wearily, tasting success.
- She fainted, and the vampire rushed to pick her up. "Three second rule!"
- "Ia. Ia Ie!" "I'm getting sick of your prank calls, Cthulhu." She hung up.
- Pro-tip: Wearing bells keeps harmful spirits away, but it lets the werewolves know exactly where you are.
- One day, her knight in shining armor would come, and it wouldn't melt beneath her flaming breath.
- "I know it's more expensive, but..." She bit her lip and batted her eyes. It was the same pleading look that had made him fall in love all those decades ago. "All right, give us the Alfheim package," he told the timeshare salesman.
- She looks down at the intruder, a feral smirk growing as her hellhounds step to her side. "You really should have listened to their warning barks." He screams in terror as they lunge.
- "Sometimes, you just need to get offline," she said. He looked at her with a quirked brow. "Why? Everything I need is on the internet." "There are beautiful things outside. Animals, plants, nature." "Sounds dirty."
- Whenever Marcus was too sad to get out of bed, the dog would bring him a cookie, hoping to make his master smile. Depression can't outlast a determined corgi.
- She sauntered through the living room, kicking aside one of her prey's discarded shoes. So much blood and forensic evidence in the aftermath of a feeding. She really needed to stop bringing them home.
- He kept saying, "I'm processing," whenever the topic came up. Fifteen years should have been long enough, but he still needed to process.
- I held the plate to my face, licking it rapidly, seeking every last drop of the golden nectar I'd been served. "What do you humans call this?" He stared at me with brows raised. "It's just #syrup." "Divine. I want more."
- I placed my order. "Tea, Earl Grey, hot." My date hid his face, too embarrassed to be seen with me. "You are such a nerd."
- The woman behind the counter arched a brow. "Are you sure you want to get her a meteorite for your 20th?" He nodded. "She needs to always remember she's out of this world."
- Felix was a psychic vampire. Which made it so easy to deliver bad news. Every delicious drop of grief and shock and horror was delectable upon his palate.
- "They just look like dots." "Maybe to you. But to me, these speckles mean they're here." She gritted her teeth. "Can't believe I'm allergic to werewolf."
- To whomever reads this: I can only #sketch out the broad strokes for you, give you the groundwork. But if you want to see how deep this rabbit hole goes, YOU have to make the journey.
- The scholar looked up at the troll. "Have your people no great thinkers, no philosophy we could share?" The troll rubbed his tummy, eyeing the fire. "No think. Only eat."
- His #approach was that of a thunderstorm. Of a stalking tiger. Of pure sexy power and heat and strength. She was overwhelmed, unable to do more than pant. He offered his hand. "Care to dance?"
- The necromancer grew pieces of her former lovers in jars, just like cuttings of plants. She gave them the same care and attention as any gardener, watching them grow more robust day by day.
- Her sorcery had created a #pocket dimension for her garden. It was always on the verge of summer, warm and full of blooming flowers.
- He bellowed, calling for his family. Only a lonely echo replied, reminding him of all that was lost. Maybe tomorrow.
- I can't hear the flick of a lighter and not #crave the pipe. That familiar reek of chemical and poison and sweet high. The deep clouds of intoxicant that corrupt my lungs and release me from my flesh.
- "It's funny," the mercenary said, uncoiling from his spot in the corner of the tavern. "Those who try hardest to pick a fight have rarely been in them."
- He'd been told The Populace was so well-trained, they wouldn't #question anything a Leader said. "Discovered today: the sky is a chocolate candy shell." The populace just nodded in agreement.
- The seraph spread its seven wings further, an angelic form of mantling. "Why are you not #awestruck?" It stared at the only woman still on her feet. She smiled, and drew a sword from the aether. "#Awe is for mortals."
- The review was repulsive enough. "Knives are sharp enough to butcher a human in 20 mins!" More disturbing was that three people had found it useful.
